'For the Sake of Old Times'

New Year's Eve is my favorite holiday.  Has been since my days at the Skate Center of Roanoke Valley, rolling around repeatedly for hours and hours with my friends in our favorite new clothes from Christmas, having nothing but time on our side.  Skate Center always hosted an All-Nite Skate (spelling intended for pop culture purposes, or maybe in the interest of fitting on the changeable letter sign at the street) from 7pm to 7am.  We frequented the rink at least five days a week - most of us worked there part-time at some point - and definitely accumulated more than 12 hours over those days, but to just park it there socially for the whole twelve hours in one shot seemed a daring, challenging, privileged treat.  Something about having a place to be, where all your friends would already also be, was comforting and eased the pressure of adolescence social life for a bit. 

I've always loved the energy of New Year's Eve.  I'm usually nostalgic when things move on or experiences end - I was always the kid who would break down crying after getting home on the last day of school because I already missed my friends and the routine.  But it's different on New Year's Eve.  I'm always truly excited.  I think maybe because it forces a simultaneous nostalgia and excitement.  

Skate Center would have extra fun stuff during their All-Nite Skate, like playing the year's top hits in some sort of billboard chart order in between my favorite Prince songs, a few moments of sock-hop style dancing in the middle, more speed-skate races than usual, concession "pop-up" sales, and the infamous balloon drop at midnight with the disco lights swirling above us.  

It always seemed like everyone was happy.  I could be wrong, but that's how it felt when I was a kid.  Other holidays seemed more serious, like more could go wrong, or expectations were higher, or things felt heavier.  But not New Year's Eve.  

I also generally appreciate countdowns.  They give me a false sense of control on time.  They also, no matter what you're counting down toward, provoke energy.  Counting backward while getting anesthesia?  Counting off a song?  Watching a clock count down during a basketball game?  Counting down to Christmas?  The last day of school?  All energy.  Shared energy.  For a brief moment on New Year's Eve, billions of us can share the same energy for the same reason, on the same numbers.  That's so exciting to me! 

My top favorite New Year's Eve of all time was 2015 going into 2016.  We were in Santiago, Chile.  The whole trip was a surprise crafted by my husband.  On top of that surprise, I had officially discovered I was pregnant with Arthur a few days before.  I had packed a pregnancy test with me, on a hunch, and we decided to do the test the morning after Christmas.  So, a surplus of excited energy was already buzzing.  Not knowing what to expect in a different country, I was thinking we'd have a meal out and maybe find a bar to hang around for the countdown to midnight.  Unbeknownst to me, Santiago is known for its new year's eve street party celebration.  My husband knew this.  That's why we were there.  

Now, on my bucket list for NYE is to be in NYC for the balldrop, with the gazillion people, standing for hours and hours waiting for confetti.  It sounds equal parts miserable and invigorating.  I expect this experience to require a host of tedious planning points, starting with wardrobe and a teacher's bladder once I get to whatever speck of concrete jungle is mine for the evening.  Notice I'm speaking in singular tense because I can't imagine anyone I live with ever agreeing to do this with me, so I figure I'll be alone in my giddy-New York zone.  Whenever the stars align for me to do this, it will be brilliant.  (I'm accepting applications to join me on this excursion.  You must be able to strike a balance between persistence of joy and self-ridiculing the entire adventure in the first place.)  

So it was 10:30pm in Santiago and we went for a walk to sorta get our bearings, thinking there'd have to be some sort of security or general hassle about to be faced in getting into this celebration thing.  It was strangely silent.  We literally asked ourselves at one point if it was, in fact, New Year's Eve.  Maybe we were jet-lagged and confused?  I mean, we're from NoVa so we're not even vocalizing all the NoVa questions that we most definitely were swirling in our heads...there's tickets, right?...maybe a website to register?...surely we can't just...arrive and...that's it?  But that's precisely all we had to do.  We were just awkwardly early.  Around 11:30, it was suddenly packed as far as the eyes could see in all directions near the Santiago capitol building, with bands playing, people rolling up grills on the sidewalks, sharing chorizo sausages, selling light-up hats, toys, and noisemakers, popping champagne, and singing.  The singing and chanting were SO fun.  "Chi-Chi-Chi!  Le-Le-Le!  Viva Chile!"  Everyone, and I mean everyone was the friendliest people we've ever encountered in a large group of strangers.  Children joined their parents, sang, chanted, played with toys they'd brought from home, danced...it was so very joyous and inviting.  The countdown was shouted in Spanish (a fun spontaneous challenge for my brain) and at midnight, it literally rained champagne as the fireworks rained behind it.  Grand fireworks, lasting for about a half-hour, as most of the crowd stayed and danced and sang, while others spilled into the bar scenes and streets surrounding it, seemingly as quickly and casually as they had all gathered.  I sipped orange Fanta or something like it from a guy selling it out of his cooler, and marveled at how effortlessly joyous the whole experience had been.  I was then, and still am today, considerably grateful to my husband for his attentive, thoughtful planning on this one.    

Chilean flag in the background and thousands of very friendly strangers

Other noteworthy New Year's Eves:

- 2013 going into 2014.  Ubud, Bali.  We were on our honeymoon and spent the afternoon on a bike eco-tour through rice patties, villages, and gardens.  That evening, on a recommendation from our hotel's concierge, walked up the street to the Laughing Buddha - the happy happening place in town, according to its website, which I just checked nervously to see if it was still around.  It is!  And it is very much the happy happening place to be!  They have live music nightly and on that particular evening had a well above average blues band.  We sat near the front windows, which were open because southern hemisphere (another credit to my husband's detailed planning for happiness...get me out of the cold during the winter) and bathed in a lovely concoction of blues, rain steadily falling, locals' fireworks despite it, and gamelan music spilling from up the street.  That's a happy day.  

- 1996 going into 1997.  I was at JMU and it was winter break.  A romance that was always on sorta shaky ground had ended just before break and I was pretty down, but managing.  I was also in a horrible car accident a week or so after that and suffered bad whiplash and a broken nose.  A great friend traveled down to Salem to be with me upon hearing of it, and held an ice pack to the back of neck while watching bad television for at least a few days.  The shaky relationship that had ended called me, which was unexpected, and invited me to come back to JMU for a New Year's Eve party.  I was thrilled, because I had been worried that I would lose some of the related friendships when the relationship fizzled and the invitation and its timing relieved me of that stress.  The party was perfectly low-key, I had black eyes from the broken nose so plenty of thoughtful but funny jokes, friends played music, tons of laughing, and the shaky relationship started back up.  Long term, this wasn't a great thing, but that particular year it made for a great New Year's Eve spent with people I still cherish.  

- 2014 going into 2015.  Matt was sick, so we didn't venture out and about.  We did however get a little dressed up, have a fancy dinner in our dining room, and make very decadent amaretto chocolate parfait-like cocktails that were amazing.  

- One of the NYE's between 2001 and 2006.  Driving to Atlanta to visit a friend who was living there at the time for graduate school.  Pretending we were guests at the Westin Hotel downtown so we could gain access to the top floor rotating bar.  Not being dressed quite elegantly enough but the bouncer letting us in anyway.  Discussing getting tattoos, visiting the lobby of a tattoo parlor, then not following through on getting any tattoos.  Driving the seven hour trip back the next day with another friend and it snowing heavily during the last two hour stretch.  Constantly using the windshield wiper fluid to try to clear the windshield enough to see.  Running out of windshield wiper fluid long before it would've been a good time to run out of windshield wiper fluid.  My friend sticking his arm out the passenger window trying to wipe it clean with the sleeve of his jacket.  Laughing hysterically at how futile all attempts were turning out.  Calling it about 30 miles from home, which based on how it was going would have taken us six more days to travel.  Putting our money together to stay in a Holiday Inn and my friend negotiating that we get the honeymoon suite which they gave us, mostly because my friend is particularly charming with words.  Making up hysterical stories about what kind of wedding we'd just had and the roadside adventure honeymoon we were currently having.  This was probably the funniest NYE so far.

- 1999 into 2000.  I was dating Manny, a bartender from Honduras.  We went to a house party hosted by a friend of his, maybe 20 or so people.  At midnight, the crowd was very loud - shouting, hugging, etc.  Manny and I ate grapes under a table - a Honduran tradition.  The grapes had to be green, and we had to each eat 10 before 12:01.  I remember a lot of giggling from the eating, and being crouched under a table and the fact that Manny was very, very cute made for more and more giggling.  

-2009 going into 2010.  I was really sick with bronchitis/almost pneumonia.   I was in bed by 9:00 miserably beginning my stretch of 18-minute catnaps.  The night passed with zero pomp or circumstance and I was sad about that.  Then in January, I had my wisdom teeth out so more time sorta down for the count.  But in February, we had a NYE Do-Over, and that was wonderful. We dressed up, we had a fancy dinner, and we had a countdown and everything.  It was silly and fun and again, all because of who I married.  

Having all these fond memories of New Year's Eve, I take it pretty seriously.  I find it a way to mark my life.  I'm possibly quite annoying to be around during this time of the year with all my reflective burst and twirling spirit.  But I've managed to find friends who tolerate my list-making and articles I'll droll on about, and for that I am very grateful.  I also take seriously the "out with the old, in with the new" bit.  I love making resolutions and treating January as a clean slate.  It resonates with me.  I know it doesn't for others.  I've gotten better over the years about being more realistic with what I set out to try, and I give myself grace for the things that don't happen.  But I really enjoy the combined nostalgia of the year with hope towards new beginnings.   

I wonder how Arthur will perceive this holiday.  I want him to get similar joy from it as I do.  I want him to experience the practice of making goals and changing his mind when he finds they don't suit him, and reflecting and celebrating when they do.  I want him to decide what days of the year are important for him to celebrate in whatever ways he chooses.  Most of all, I want him to have a long list of fun memories from which to choose his favorites.  

So, on what could possibly be the biggest sigh of relief of a New Year's Eve...may you find some sort of peace, clarity, a countdown to better days ahead - for auld lang syne.